448 reviews
$24.99

 

American Flag Silkies

"I bought a pair for my 4th of July party, thinking it would be fun gag shorts. Little did I know. I pulled it out of the box and immediately sank to my knees and wept tears of pure joy, and by "pure joy" I mean "pure Jack Daniel's". I strapped it on and my max bench press increased by a 100lbs. I wiped the whiskey from my face, looked in the mirror, and in my reflection I saw him behind me.

George Washington. Looking stern and powerful. He nodded once, an affirmation. I knew what I had to do. It was Freedom time.

I flung myself from the bathroom window and these shorts literally turned me into a bald eagle, I flew over Iraq and pooped tomahawk missiles on ISIS positions, then I flew back home and turned into a 1967 Pontiac GTO and drove all night until I arrived at Pussytown."

  • 100% Silky Smooth Poly
  • Elastic waistband
  • Inside pocket
  • Built-in liner brief for maximum comfort

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American Flag Silkies

"I bought a pair for my 4th of July party, thinking it would be fun gag shorts. Little did I know. I pulled it out of the box and immediately sank to my knees and wept tears of pure joy, and by "pure joy" I mean "pure Jack Daniel's". I strapped it on and my max bench press increased by a 100lbs. I wiped the whiskey from my face, looked in the mirror, and in my reflection I saw him behind me.

George Washington. Looking stern and powerful. He nodded once, an affirmation. I knew what I had to do. It was Freedom time.

I flung myself from the bathroom window and these shorts literally turned me into a bald eagle, I flew over Iraq and pooped tomahawk missiles on ISIS positions, then I flew back home and turned into a 1967 Pontiac GTO and drove all night until I arrived at Pussytown."

Customer Reviews
5.0 Based on 448 Reviews
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L
12/24/2019
Lunchbox
United States United States
I recommend this product
Soft as an Angels kiss

I got these for the Annual F**k Isis party we have. The package arrived and when I opened it I heard angels singing because of how soft and silky these clothing of the Gods felt. All I can say is if you don’t own a pair or 10 of these then something is wrong with you.

MN
12/24/2019
Michael N.
United States United States
I recommend this product
My neighbors cower in fear

Silkies have long been my garment of choice but I've always hesitated getting the wild colors and patterns. I know now that my hesitation was wise. My neighborhood has been disrupted by these beauties. My men neighbors are ashamed of the glory I am displaying, their wives are all finding reasons to stop by the front yard. (Quite awkward since I'm a **** and wet house wives do **** for me) Recently a teenage girl took out a mailbox driving through the neighborhood she was so distracted by these thighs. I was also called Daddy by the guy that runs past every evening... he looked very confused by his desires. What I'm telling you is these things are powerful and you should wield that power with caution. I'm out here raking leaves, making house wives wet, shaming chicken legged men, creating bisexual men, and destroying parts of the postal service. Weild them wisely. On a serious note I purchased xl due to these big thighs while the silkies fit awesome. The "leg holes"(?) In the built in briefs leave no worries that my meat or potatoes are going to wiggle out. That elastic is military grade. ***** so strong it doubles as a tourniquet, or an improvised grenade launcher with a 100 yard range. To recap the leg holes are tight and these shorts make most holes wet, and cause men to question their sexuality. 12\10 would recommend.

KR
02/11/2020
Kathryn R.
United States United States
I recommend this product
Real quality

The silkies I ordered fit perfectly. No strings hanging off of seams and the fabric is cozy. I can’t wait to hit the trails.

TV
02/09/2020
Timothy V.
United States United States
I recommend this product
Like ‘em

My first experience with this type of shorts. Very comfortable and free flowing. Would buy again.

GM
02/05/2020
Greg M.
United States United States
I recommend this product
‘Mercia!

Exactly what I expected...perfection!

Greg Massey verified customer review of Star Spangled Silkies
JUST SEEN

Shipment Explanation

This item is special. Like you! We have so many designs that we can only keep a handful in stock. So special items like this are only made when you purchase them. Trust us, it's worth the wait!

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